Struggles

Since October of 2006 I have been doing an exercise and diet regimen. I started going to a place called Curves. It is for women only which helps and kinda is the reason that I still go. I think if the place was swarming with men I wouldn't go. Since starting this, I look back and notice several changes. My family and I don't eat out anymore. There are changes in what I eat and how much I eat as well as when I eat. I don't really call this a struggle. What I consider a struggle is the fact that is pretty much is the all "ME" show. My trainer keeps saying "You must make time for yourself". To me that is selfish. For the past 10 years or so it has been about what others want. Not that, that is a bad thing. I really like making sure that others are happy and well cared for. But when do you finally decide that you have put others ahead of you so much that you don't konw how to do something nice for yourself?

My God has given me a weird brain. Things bounce around in there and some of it spills out for you to read. I hope that you have a great and wonderful day.

Sisters

I have a sister-in-law that I used to think of as my sister. We were close. We were best friends. Or at least I thought so. But for some reason I have "dropped the ball" so to speak. I don't know how or why but for some reason we are not as close as we once were. We are more like casual friends. People who put up with each other because they have to. I miss the friendship and comradry that we once had. I wonder is God ever feels that way about us? He created us in His image. But do we thank Him or even just sit down and talk to Him for more than just prayer requests of I need or could you please. If you really need it God will give it to you in His time. Just sit and talk with Him better yet, Listen. Just say "God I am here to listen to your voice and heed your advice". Maybe that is all I need to do with my sister. Love ya Netterz :o)

Hugs

I was in church on Sunday during the praise and worship time and realized just how tired I was. I don't know why that feeling came over me because all week long I was not feeling tired at all. We sang a new song in church called "The More I Seek You", it was the best song I had heard all week long. During this song the Spirit of God was in this place. You could see it on the faces of the people around you and you could feel it so strongly in building. My son, when he feels that he just gets a weepy. So, I bent down so I could talk to him in his ear. I told him "David, all you need to do is reach out and God is there. He is always there for you. If you need a hug just reach up and ask for a hug." And at that point I realized, I needed that hug. I know that I am not where I need to be in the Lord but I know that I am not where I once was. Thanks to God's Love and Mercy He saved me. I also know that He didn't come just to save me but to save all and that is now my goal. To talk to as many people as I can about God and what He has done for them. That is not just my calling but all who claim to be Christians. I had such a peace about me yesterday at work that I actually calmed a customer down just by smiling and lowering my hand to let her know that I do hear her and that the problem is being taken care of. I was so amazed at how God was working through my life yesterday. It was the greatest feeling in the world. On the way home from work I was praising and worshiping the Lord and He was right there with me. I couldn't have been any happier than I was at that moment, to have the Creator of this world, my Lord and Savior take time to be with me in my car. I have never felt so blessed.
Thank you Lord

Helping

Being helpfull is good. But how do you know who gets help first? Is it someone in the church or your neighbor next door who knows you are a christian and needs some help? We, as christians, are the light of the world. I know that God guides us and leads us but does He actually tell you who to help or does He let us decide which one needs it more. Those in the church are called to be ministers to those that are lost and need help finding their way. I want to help them find their way.

Faithfullness Part 2

Faithfulness: Making faith a living reality in one's life.

Matthew 24:45 says
Who then is a faithful and wise servant, whom his lord hath made ruler over his household, to give them meat in due season?
46 Blessed is that servant, whom his lord when he cometh shall find so doing.
47 Verily I say unto you, that he shall make him ruler over all his goods.


I pray each day that if the Lord does come that day that He finds me faithful. We are told that God just wants all of you. All the broken pieces everything. Just be a willing vessel totallycomitted to doing the will of God. Is that Fatihfullness? Is faithfullness different for each person?

I am sorry about this post my brain is flying in so many different directions right now it is hard to keep up. My next post will be better unless I can't resolve this and then who knows where it will go. But I would like to leave you with one thought. God is still in control no matter what the situation. So I know that I will get the answers that I seek if I just continue to ask the Creator of all things. Be Blessed and be a Blessing today. :o)

Faithfullness

I have a question. I am hoping that someone who reads this can let me know. Is faithfullness all that God requires? I have been wrestling with this question for nearly a week and can't seem to find the answer. If anyone knows or has any ideas please feel free to let me know.

Stuff

It is amazing how much stuff you can learn from a blog. There is a lot of stuff that you can learn about just from talking to people or reading things they write. Strength comes from God. All good gifts and perfect gifts come from God. Strength isn't one of the gifts that that verse is talking about I know but I believe that everything we have comes from above and we should be thankful for all that we have and do not have but will be getting if only we ask. Ask and it shall be given, seek and ye shall find, knock and the door shall be open unto you. You have not because you ask not. Remember just ask.

Love

I woke up this morning and rolled over and just looked at my husband. While laying here blatantly starring, with him not knowing it, realizing just how much in love with him I am. When I was young I always said that I wasn't going to get married and wasn't having children. It is amazing how things really work out. It is the same with God. Have you ever just been sitting there thinking about Him and all that He has done for you and realized how much you really REALLY love Him? Again, it is simply amazing.

Christmas

It is Christmas time again. At first I was not happy or excited about it. My grandmother died in July of this year. She was the only grandparent I had left and she was the one that me and my sisters were the closest to. But now, I am totally looking forward to it. I can't wait to see my kids faces when they open their presents. It is going to be a great day. Not just because of the presents and fun but because the greatest gift of all was given to all. I love Christmas. I hope and pray that everyone has a great Christmas this year and every year to come.

Holiday Traditions

My family and I did something today that we have never done before. We actually had the money this year to bless others with a good Christmas. My husband and I felt lead by the Lord to bless a family that we used to go to church with. It was such a wonderful feeling. We have helped others before but this was a little different. I don't know why this was different it just was. We went shopping and we picked out the gifts that we wanted to give and then brought them home and wrapped them all and then took them and dropped them off on their front porch. We had a great time, our kids too. I hope to continue the tadition each year and praying that the Lord will give us the name of the family that He wants to bless that year. My challenge to you is to pray through this next year and see how the Lord wants to use you that year to bless others.

Stress

I was just thinking about stress. Such a little word to cause sooo much trouble. I am also realizing why it is important for moms to be home all the time. My children went to stay the night with their aunt last night so my husband and I had the whole house to ourselves. The thing is we were too exhausted from working for the day that we went straight to bed. LOL I never realized just how important it is to talk to your spouse about your day until you don't. Anyway, I went to work this morning at 6 am and was busily doing my job when I got a phone call. Which made my whole world come to a screeching halt for 1/2 an hour. My husband was calling to tell me that my son's school was trying to get ahold of us because he was sick and we needed to come and get him. Wow! I felt so bad because when your kids are sick you just want to be there with them and make them feel better. Well, I couldn't do that and that bugged me badly. I was calling everyone I could think of to go and pick him up from school because when I told me boss that my son's school called and needed someone to go and get him she looked like she was ready to blow a gasket or something. Which didn't help my world any. The first thing out of her mouth was "Can you get someone to go and get him?". Finding someone to go and pick up YOUR kid is not that easy. I mean he is MY kid I should be going to take care of him, right? Well, the first person I called of course was my mother. I didn't want to call the aunt that they spent the night with because she has her job that she has to go to and I feel like I use her too much as it is. So, I called my mom. My mom lives about 15 minutes away and she was not dressed for the day and things like that so it would have been an hour before she could get him. Wow, never thought I would hear the words "I really can't help today sweetie" coming from her. But she was helpful in reminding me that my brother-in-law was currently unemployed and would probably go and get him. Well, by this time I had been dealing with this for about 10 minutes and my boss was not pleased. You could see it in her eyes. So, I hung up with my mom and called my brother-in-law. He said yes he would go and pick him up and take him to his house so my sister could watch him for me till I got off work. I was so relieved but the story doesn't end there. I remembered that my brother-in-law was not on my son's pick up list. So, I had to call the school and let them know who was going to be picking him up and why. They said okay no problem as long as he has his ID. So, then I call my brother-in-law back and tell him what the school said and so off he went. Wow, busy morning right. By the time I got off the phone and all was settled it had been a 1/2 an hour. My boss still not happy. Asked if I needed to leave? I told her no and she said "good". Hello, a store that claims they are family oriented sure didn't seem like it this morning.
Anyway, all that to say that "Stress it's a killer". My pastor was talking about stress on Wenesday night and so I am trying to relieve all stress from my life. That is hard to do. Really hard. I have two young kids and stress just seems to follow me around. If anyone knows a good stress reliever now would be a good time to share.

Reminders

I was lookinb back at my last blog and read the last line that states something like all things work together for good. Well, my husband asked me this morning to pray for him so I have been all day. He is worried about somethings that I really don't think he should worry about. I was in the living room helping the kids get ready for school and silently praying and a verse came to me. "All things work together for good, to them that love the Lord and are called according to His purpose." That verse was pressing on me so I went in the bedroom to talk to my husband and that is what I told him. That is what I felt like I should say to him at that time. Whatever happens is out of our hands but God knows and He will provide because He says so in Hi word. Faith the grain of a mustard seed can move mountains. I am believing God and standing on His word. Everything will be fine.

Concerns

I don't want to bother anyone who reads this but I have one thing to ask. Please be in prayer for me. I don't usually ask for prayer for myself because that just seems selfish in my way of thinking. I am not telling what the specific need is right now, because if family memebers read this I don't want them to call with their advice. I want God's advice. My family is very important to me and I don't want to hurt any of them at all but we are human, flesh and bone, and we make mistakes. We make decisions based on emotions and feelings. If we are feeling strong and upbeat then we answer one way but at the end of the day if asked the same question our answer will be different. Starting today I am starting a prayer journal. I am going to write down all my cares, concerns, prayer needs things like this in this book and everyday prayer for each one of them specifically and watch how God works in each and everyone of them. I know without a shadow of a doubt that this is not where God wants me to be in my Christian walk. I am changing and growing more each day, but again I am human. I fail and fall and make mistakes but with His help and guidance all will work together for good.

Eye Openers

Well, I have always heard that by not going to church and by not reading the word of God that you are giving a foot hold to the devil. I can't say that I never believed that but wasn't sure if those 2 little things could cause so much trouble. Well, I was wrong! My family and I have missed 3 weeks of church and the last time that I really sat down to read and study the word was at least that long. Things are changing in my world and not really sure if they are good. Some of them are bad. I know now that I need to watch everything I say. I may not think it is bad but to hear it come from my kids sounds terrible. I am not talking about cursing and that sort of thing. But just a lot of negative things. Does God feel the same way? We are all God's children created in His image. Would He or Does He enjoy listening to us say those things? If I don't like hearing it come from my kids why would He like hearing it come from us? I am 29 years old. I don't think I am that old but I don't want to become so set in my ways now that I can't change them. Lord, Help me to change. Keep me in your will. So me your ways. I want to be just like you in all that I do and say. Amen.

A Long Time

Well, it has been a long time since I last posted anything. I didn't really have a lot to say on my last post and I am praying that the Lord will give me something useful to say now. A post or two back I stated that I was on a diet and exercise program. Well, I am happy to report that I am still on the same program and I have lost 9 1/2 pounds in 3 weeks. I am happier with myself and seem to be in better health which is making my husband very happy. I never realized that when one got married they stopped really worrying about themselves as much. You begin to think about what you can do to make the other person happy. The first chapter or day 1 in the 40 days of purpose book stats "It's not about me". That is true not only with Christ but with a marriage. It's not about me. Why does everything have to center around me? Christ is the husband coming for His bride. We not only need to be ready but we need to be thinking about what would make Him happy. What does He want us to do? It is Thanksgiving day think of all the things that you are thankful for and just spend some time today Thanking God for all that He has done and will do in your life. Have a great Thanksgiving day.

Nothing much

Well, there is nothing much really going on here. I am glad to say that all is well with me and my family. God is continuously blessing us and for that we are thankful. The exercise class that I am currently attending is hard and making me not want to eat because I have to work it off again. At least at some point I will lose weight. There is always a rainbow at the end of a storm.

Just a little insight

I realize that it has been several days since my last blog. I am sorry for that. I would just like to let you know what has been going on. Nothing big and major has happened. Praise the Lord! Today will make my 7th day straight at work. Don't get me wrong I like my job. But no matter how much I like it, it just feels soooo good to stay at home on your day off.

Well, Yesterday was Sunday and it was supposed to be my day off after 5 days. I was looking forward to it. Despite the fact that I wasn't really going to have the Full day off because I help my husband on Sunday mornings at 2:30am, but after church I would be at home for the rest of the evening. Ahhhh! :o) Sadly, that didn't happen. I got a call about 3:30 yesterday afternoon asking if I could come in at 7 and work till 10 or I could close the place down at 9. I foolishly said okay but because of a meeting that started at 6 at church I wouldn't be able to be there until 7:15. They said Great! So, 7:15 comes and I am at work on a SUNDAY! I am not happy with myself or the people there. The guy that was working until I got there had the place in such a mess I didn't actually leave until 10:20pm. Now remember I have been up since 2:30am. I was tired, frustrated and it showed on my face. Now, another thing is that I will have OVER 40 hours this week and they HATE anyone getting over time. Nothing I can do about that right. So, they said that I could keep it or I could take it off sometime between now and Thursday. With any luck Thursday is my next day off. I realized that no matter how tired I am or frustrated I am with my job or the people there it is still my duty to show the Love of God to each person that I come in contact with. It has never hit me so hard as it did last night when I got home and was soooo tired that I literally collapsed on the bed from exhaustion. I feel like I have missed so much this week at my home and there is really nothing I can do about it. I know that my family sees God's love in the little things but the people of the world don't even see it in the big things. Like just watching a tree sway in the wind. That is why we as Christians are here. To help those that need it the most. Like I said this is just a little insight that I have begun to realize after yesterday.

The hardest thing

I have recently started trying to change myself for the better. I am highly overweight and I am now currently on a exercise and diet program. It is so hard. I know that I can make it with God's help. He gave me the strength to actually get up this morning despite the fact that my leg muscles are so very sore from Tuesdays workout, and go workout again after I took my kids to school. I know that if it was just me I wouldn't have even bothered but I have been praying about this and I know that it was God directing me this morning. It is still going to be hard but I believe I can make it. Please keep me in your prayers. Have a great and Blessed day in the Lord.

Two Questions

I went to a women's meeting last night and was asked two questions. So, I thought that I would share these questions with you. Where are you in the Lord and are you where you want to be? What is your heart's desire? I know that I am not where I want to be in the Lord but I am so much closer to Him now than ever before. And right now I just want more. How about you?

Is Christ the Theme of your Ministry

2 Corinthians 4:3

If our gospel is hidden, then it is hidden from them that are lost. There are people lost and dying in this world and our ministry is to seek them out and preach them the gospel of Christ so they too can have eternal life. If Christ is the light of the world and Christ lives in us then we are His light to those that are in darkness. With God's help I will not procrastinate any longer. I will not hide the gospel from those that are lost.